the stranger's change of heart.

two days of not having a proper internet connection really bored the brain inside of me. little did i know it mean to brought a purpose. yes, for two days the only things i could access to are quizilla and facebook. for two days i've read awesome stories and checked every notification there is on my facebook account. and yesterday night, i got the good news. wandering hopelessly onto the social networking site that i am in, i saw a batchmate's post about a testimony of a lady about God's message for His people and her little tour in heaven and hell. not that i dont believe in all those things but i guess i've outgrown the teaches of my family about it and it was scrapped by the influence of people in me until yesterday night. i always believed in Him, the miracles that He does, and ofcourse the sanctuary of the good and evil. i've read bits and parts of the testimony of the lady, but ofcourse, as a person with the ability to confuse myself, i admit that doubt had stirred in me whether what she had said of talking to our dear Father was lie or not. but then i've realized whether it was the truth or it wasnt, i know from myself that He exists and so does Heaven and Hell. Ive shuddered from the thought of those people in agony burning in that fiery place and realized the thought that when i've done my mission here on earth, i want to go and live in Heaven with Him. who doesnt? then my mistakes and all the sins ive made came into view making me think that whoa, where is that little girl who was afraid to mutter a curse? where is that little girl who doesnt think of anything else but positivity and goodness? where is that little whom God created? i abruptly remembered all those things that had been rusting in my mind, my heart and soul. i thought of the factors that had affected my faith. whom had i become? and i realize i must change. hence my new blog title. i may not easily break my habit but im trying to break off those that stained my being as a daughter of the Almighty Father. i had quite let myself drank the fact that all those things whom i thought noone witnessed were watched by That Glorious Someone. i feel really ashamed right now and i feel dislike towards myself that i could not abruptly diminish and undo my doings. i wanna change myself as soon as possible but as a human that i am, i know the fact that change is taken step by step. i asked Him forgiveness right after before i slept last night and promised to gradually erase those unbearable stuffs that had ruined me. i know it isnt too late, cause i know the love He had for us doesnt have a time limit.